Mailboxes, Jugglers and Bunny Slippers

I wrote this for my company's blog but thought I'd share it here, too, since it can apply to any of us.   Hope you enjoy it!!

I am showing my age by saying that I remember very well life before email and text messages. There were a lot more meetings, a lot more phone calls, and a lot more mail in the mailbox –the one next to the street you plant flowers around.   I remember having beautiful stationery reflecting my style and personality and professionally created business stationery. I remember wearing out the Bell South phone book and my overflowing Rolodex.  I remember having beautiful handwriting, using a typewriter, a dictionary and knowing numerous addresses and phone numbers by heart.  I even remember busy signals!

It’s really kind of amazing when you think about how modern technology has changed our lives in regards to how we communicate.  To think that correspondence can go around the globe in a split second is mind-boggling to me.   

On one hand it is wonderful…no stationery and stamps to buy and no long distance charges…and just think about how many trees are saved.   Communication is instantaneous now.  It allows us to get things done faster especially when collaborating with others on whatever the situation, event or project.  It allows us to be more productive, more efficient and even, in a different way, more social.   It allows me to be able to work remotely.  Wherever I am, I’m ‘in the office’ and going to work each day in my PJ’s and slippers is a bonus.

But there are a few drawbacks to this technology.  Can our brains really handle the overload of communication?  I may not be able to walk and chew gum but I can sure tend to emails and text messages while doing other things at the same time…or can I?

Here’s a true story from last week:   I’m sitting at the airport waiting to board my flight home.  Like everyone at the gate, I was looking at my phone checking email.  In the middle of one with an important question that needed a quick response, my son calls…I leave email, answer, chat with my boy and hear a ding that I have a text message.   I look at the message which was another urgent question from a franchisee that I’ll respond to when I hang up.  Call ends, I go to the text message and the boarding announcement comes over the loudspeaker.  I had made it to the upgrade list so I had to get on first because that’s just a cool (and rare) thing to get to do.  After getting settled in my first class seat and feeling lucky, I go back to that email that needed a response.  The flight attendant interrupts  because she loves my shoes and I had to tell her what a bargain they were.  After that distraction, I go back to the phone and begin responding to the text.  I’ve forgotten about the email.  Now my phone rings again.  It’s the husband just checking to see if the flight is leaving on time.   Now the attendant is announcing to turn phones off.   2 hours later I’m back home to my welcoming committee of husband with a martini ready and the excited doggies.  Then I’m unpacking, doing laundry, making dinner, and guess what?   Neither email nor text got a response.  Now I look and feel like the rudest, most inattentive, non-caring person on the planet.  Because of that attempt at juggling,  I let two people down that needed something from me.

So I’m making some changes to improve my communication management and etiquette.

Instead of hopping off what I’m doing when I hear the ‘ding’, I’m going to check email and text messages 5 times a day.

I actually have turned off the ‘dings’ on all equipment and devices.  During those 5 times, I will stay focused on the email responding appropriately to each one, then I’ll go to the texts.

One might say, “Well, that’s just normal nowadays, get over it!”  I never have been and never want to be ‘ just normal’.  Who does?

I've turned on the Preview Pane in email so I can prioritize the urgency of each email.

I'm looking for how I can see an email on my phone that won't mark it as read on the computer.  I've had things 'get lost' doing that.  Let me know if you know how to make that work.

I’m going to get over the need to be a master multi-tasker and recognize that there is no such thing.  I can have only one thought at a time.  Those thoughts may be fast and back and forth but it’s true, changing those thought gears distracts and takes time.  Time to focus and refocus.

After a slight wrist-slapping from a co-worker who I won't name but his initials are MK, I made this promise: "On my honor, I will do my best to do my duty to…..respond to every Showhomes email". 

Responses are simply courteous and don’t require writing a novel.  I know myself, it can be quite disheartening to send an important or informational email and hear back from no one.  I don’t want to be guilty of that any more.  I’m going down the ‘do unto others’ path.  I promise!

My husband’s company has created a culture where all interoffice emails REQUIRE a response in 7 words or less. I love that!  This, at the very least, acknowledges receipt of the message. Maybe we could create that culture among our network??

"Thanks for bringing it to my attention"

"Haven't found time for it, YET"

"I'll get right on it"

"I'm clear on it"

"Got it, Thanks"  or   "Not yet, sorry"

"No, thanks"   or   "I will"

"Thanks"   or   "Okay"   or   "Yes"   or "No"   or   "Great"

I wonder what’s next to have to learn, refine and manage.  My greatest fear is that it's going to be video conferencing.  That will take some adjustments for me.  It will require changing from my PJ’s, putting on make-up and doing my hair.  I’ve become spoiled to no dress codes working from home.  At least you won’t see my bedroom slippers!

Cheers!!
Lynn

That Sunny Friday in November - 50 Years Ago

Everyone has a few events during their life that seem like they happened just yesterday.  You remember where you were, what you were doing, how you felt and how it affected your life going forward.

My parents would talk occasionally about the WWII era and particularly about Pearl Harbor .   I remember my grandfather telling about witnessing the hanging of an outlaw as a young child. Who would take a child to a hanging??   At any rate, even decades later, they could relay every detail of what it was like and the emotions they experienced.

One of my clear memory events was when I was in 4th grade.  It was a sunny Friday in November.  My teacher was Mrs. Wood.  Even though I don’t have a perfectly clear memory of other grade school classes, I can recall every detail of this class on this day.  I remember the classmates and where they sat.    I remember the multiplication tables on the blackboard that we were learning. We had to get up in front of the class one by one with a yardstick, point to each as we recited the answer.   I even remember what I was wearing that day.  A wool plaid pleated skirt, yellow sweater, navy knee socks and brown penny loafers (with dimes in them).

On this day, Mrs. Wood went out of the classroom and was gone longer than normal.  We were getting a little restless and were whispering to each other even though we were not supposed to talk when the teacher was out of the room.  I just knew someone had secretly been assigned to take names so I tried to focus on the assignment so I wouldn't have to stay after school and clean the classroom.  I got in worse trouble with my parents if I ever had to stay after school.

She finally returned but Mrs. Wood didn't have her normal mean face.  It was a sad face and I could tell she had been crying.  Instead of her usual gruff loud voice, she quietly told us that school was going to be dismissed early and to gather our things because the buses would be arriving momentarily.   Hands shot up to ask questions but she called on no one.  She didn't even remind us about homework or anything as we filed out in a single line.

One notable thing about this period of time is that because of nuclear threats by the Soviet Union, schools conducted walkout drills, we had to wear dog tags and some people had fallout shelters.  At the age of 9, I didn't really understand what that was all about, but I wondered if today’s early dismissal had something to do with that.

As we walked to the bus stop, no one was talking.  Everyone had a puzzled look on their face, except for the ‘big kids’.  The ‘big kids’ were the 7th and 8th graders.  Some of the big girls were crying.  When we got on the bus and were allowed to talk, the ‘big kids’ told us ‘little kids’ that President Kennedy had been assassinated.   Assassinated was not a 4th grade word so I didn't know what they meant but my 9 year old imagination envisioned bombs and soldiers and guns. One of the‘big kids’ said that since we didn't have a president anymore, the Russians were going to bomb us. I don’t recall ever being as scared as I was on that bus ride home. I grabbed the dog tags around my neck and shoved them under my sweater.  At least if the Russians bombed our bus, someone would be able to identify me and call my mom.  My heart was racing, but I was determined to not cry like my girlfriends and I ran home as fast as I could after I got off that bus.

I was so happy to see my mom and dad and even my 4 year old little sister.  They had left work early because of this horrible thing that had happened.  Yes, our president had been killed (assassinated –a new word for me) and no, the Russians were not going to attack us.  Of course, we were glued to the TV set for the next few days.  Over and over we saw the same images.

I can’t even remember much about last week!  So, it’s amazing that 50 years later I have such clear recall of that weekend in November of 1963.  The details of my surroundings, the confusion and emotions I experienced.   The things I learned.  Young minds are fragile and impressionable.  My mind’s slideshow includes the  limo ride, the wave, the pink suit, the oath, the procession, the little boy salute.

Of course, there have been other tragic events leaving details in my memory bank.   9/11, The Challenger Disaster and Katrina to name a few.   But, none left the lasting memory recall on that 9 year old little girl like the assassination of President John F. Kennedy.

From Trash to Treasures

I've heard from quite a few people saying something like, “Haven’t seen a new blog post from you in a while. You OK?”

First, I’m happy that I have so many “Happy Hour” followers that care.   Secondly, I've been busy!

However, I have been inspired and thought several times during day to day work and play (more work than play), “Oh, that would make a good story for my blog”.   I have those in mental storage, but now I want to share my latest project and test to another part of my creativity that has taken my focus from creative writing.

Over the years, with the passing of loved ones, I acquired several pieces of furniture that have been stored away, unused.  They were old, not very attractive and not in line with my tastes and style of home decor. They just had sentimental value.  I couldn't get rid of them because that would be like tossing away a memory of those loved ones. But, I wasn't using them and they were just taking up valuable space in closets and the attic.   I was hoping to pass them down but my children don’t have the same precious memories of these pieces – which were built by my grandfather who was a carpenter.

So, I decided to revive, re-purpose, restore, redesign, re-image, re-anything to try and end my grimacing every time I ran across something that was just ‘in the way’.   Here are my finished projects, so far.

This was a small chest of drawers Papaw Adkins built for my bedroom when I was probably about 3 years old.  It is now in my green guest bedroom being used as a bedside table.  I discovered metallic paint. I think it was just what this room needed to add a little ‘funkiness’ to a traditional look.  I just love it now!

When I was a little girl, I loved playing house. All my dolls were girls and my husband was Little Joe Cartwright. (that is another blog story for later).    Anyway, this is a little hutch that was built especially for my playhouse by Papaw.  It originally was bright pink to match my play kitchen set in the playhouse and was later painted white.  (Sorry, I forgot to get a before picture)    It is now in the blue guest bedroom adding a splash of color and interest. I am tickled pink with how this turned out!  If I ever have a granddaughter, it will be ready for her playhouse.

For as long as I can remember, this small chest of drawers was at the end of a long hallway in my grandparents’ home.  I LOVE animal prints!  A little more than 10 years ago animal prints  became popular and since that time they have moved from fad to trend and, in my opinion, have now become classic.  I have this piece now in the downstairs guest bath that has green tile floors, tan Venetian plaster walls and white fixtures.  It adds a pop of contrast and has received rave reviews from guests.

I think sometimes the best therapy is to become absorbed into a project and engage any creativity one might have. With this, I surprised even myself on the creativity part and it's scaring Chip when I talk about all the other things in the house I want to paint.

This project has been my "Happy Hour" for several weeks. Besides having a few new useful and interesting furniture pieces, it was fun and brought an added bonus of wonderful thoughts and memories of people, places and things. Yes, a few little tears fell, too.   I even found a seashell inside the little hutch.  I’m sure it was from one of our many family beach vacations.

Cheers!!
Lynn

SERIOUSLY???

It’s really crazy how social media consumes so much of our time these days.  On one hand I love that I've reconnected with long lost friends.  (Yes, I had to look some of you up in the yearbook to jog my memory).  I love that I can keep up with those I care about and am interested in via snippets and photos.  I like getting news from my favorite news sources.    On the other hand, on a daily basis I encounter at least one post that makes me do the famous Lynn Eye Roll and say ‘Seriously??’

Do you follow any Whiners?  The ‘friends’ who provide a daily post complaining about something.  The kids, the job, the spouse, the traffic, the backache, etc.  Seriously??   I say, Give it a break!  In the big scheme of things, your issues are minor compared to most.   The strangest complaint is “I can’t sleep”.  Seriously??  Don’t you just want to say, “get off the #$%@ computer and try!”?

What about TMIers?   Did they really need to post about their bouts of diarrhea or the details of their most recent medical procedure or their side of a relationship break-up?  Seriously??   Definitely Too Much Information!

On the other side of that coin, are the ambiguous posts.  “Pray for me”,   “Just got good news”,   “What a jerk!”,  “I’m thrilled”,  “I think I’m going to cry”.   Seriously??   Who? What? Why? Give me details! (Just not too many!)

How about the “Hand on the Hip” pose?  It used to be a common pose by the younger set.  Same pose, different outfit.  Now, even we older gals have perfected the HOH pose.  It temporarily enhances the disappearing waistline, hides the bat wings and gives the illusion of a few pounds lighter.  Seriously??

Political Passion.  Wow!  Talk about mean spirited! Both sides!  Seriously??  

I have several friends who, unfortunately, have passed away.  Their pages are still active which is fine although it’s kind of weird to me that people still post messages to them. Seriously??  Do you really think they are checking Facebook these days?   Recently, I saw in my news feed that one of these dear friends ‘Likes’ Walmart and I was invited to ‘Like’ Walmart, too.  I know for a fact he didn’t like Walmart when he was alive so why, now that he’s gone, is Facebook telling me that he does and I should also. Seriously??

All in all, Facebook and other social media is informational and quite entertaining. It normally provides my first chuckle of the day.  I like the birthday reminders.  I've never wished most of you a happy birthday before but now I do!   I’m grateful for all the friends, acquaintances and businesses I follow.  I like getting your news.  So, beginning today I’m going to do less eye-rolling and be more compassionate and understanding.  I’m just going to un-check a bunch of people from showing up in my news feed. SERIOUSLY!!

Cheers!
Lynn

Happy Birthday to an OLD Friend

Last week was my friend Alison’s 60th birthday.  I can’t believe she is so OLD!  When I called her she admitted she was having a very tough time with this birthday.  I tried to comfort her and put a positive spin on it to make her feel better but it’s still hard to believe I have a friend this OLD.

Alison and I met when I moved to Chattanooga.  She lived just around the corner from me.  In a neighborhood of older families, we were thrilled to find each other and we had a lot in common.  We were both new to town, both stay-at-home moms with 1 year old sons.  We both played bridge, liked to shop, decorate and socialize.  It was an election year and we were definitely on the same page politically. We both loved Ronald Reagan!   We were both early risers and would talk on the phone every single morning.  We could barely see each other’s house through the trees but as soon as one of us saw a light come on at the other’s house we would be on the phone before the boys woke up.   I really don’t remember what all we would have to chat about each morning but we would plan time together with the boys  or one of us helping the other out as babysitter.  About a year later she had a daughter and a year after that, I had another son.  We could make all those car seats & strollers fit in a car one way or another!

 It broke my heart when her husband was transferred and they had to move away.  We vowed to stay in touch and we have done just that.  Even during that ancient time of only telephones on the wall and postage stamps.  We've visited whenever possible and we've talked and listened through raising our kids (she had another son a few years later), starting our post mommy careers, marriage issues, business dilemmas, losing our parents and of course politics.  I would never use the word 'vain' to describe either of us, but over the years we have talked a lot about weight loss and combating those ridiculous signs of aging.

I’m so glad Alison and I have remained good friends all these years.  In today’s busy world, local friendships are difficult enough to keep up with much less having hundreds of miles between you.   I’m so grateful for my dearest OLDER friend for more than half our lives.  Even though she’s on the Back 9, I’m looking forward to many more visits, calls, cards along with emails, text messages and Facebook pictures.

Cheers and Happy 60th, Alison!!
Lynn

P.S.  In the spirit of full disclosure, Alison is only a few months older than me.  (I’m not dealing very well with my next birthday either!)

Let's Ditch 'The Fourth of July'

"...this great anniversary festival ought to be commemorated as the day of deliverance, by solemn acts of devotion to God Almighty. It ought to be solemnized with pomp and parade, with shows, games, sports, guns, bells, bonfires and illuminations, from one end of the county to the other, from this time forever more."    -  John Adams to Abigail Adams   

I seriously dislike 'The 4th of July'.   However, I seriously LOVE ‘Independence Day’!   I have never understood why we refer to this important holiday as a simple date on the calendar.   We don’t call Christmas ‘The 25th of December’ or Valentine’s Day ‘The 14th of February’.   Do we?

Have you ever watched the musical 1776?    I can’t remember a year since it came out in 1972 that I didn’t watch it on The 4th of July Independence Day.  Afterwards, I have an ear-worm for a week…“Sit down, John!  Sit down, John! For God’s Sake John, sit down! Will someone open up a window?   Vote,Yes!   Vote Yes!   Vote for Independency!”   

Thomas Jefferson was assigned the task of drafting a document proposing independence from British rule. When the document was submitted to the full congress, there was much debate and many changes suggested. In the end, there were 86 changes and 480 words eliminated. The final draft contained 1,337 words and there were spelling, capitalization and punctuation errors. Jefferson had written that men were endowed with "inalienable" rights, but in the final copy, it came out as "unalienable". Nevertheless, The Declaration of Independence is a powerful piece of writing and a true work of art.

I have often wondered if those great men in the Continental Congress signing their names to the Declaration of Independence really had any clue of the significance of their actions. In my opinion there is no event in U.S. history more important.

Yes! The 4th of July Independence Day is one of my favorite holidays.  I am so grateful to live in this beautiful nation of independence, freedom and opportunity.  I get all sappy during our celebrations with flags, patriotic music and fireworks. I get that hot feeling in my stomach, watery eyes and goose bumps.

"We hold these Truths to be self-evident, that all Men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights that among these are Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness."

With all that said, I propose that we change what we call this important day of celebration from ‘The 4th of July’ to INDEPENDENCE DAY!

I think John and Abigail would be quite pleased with our celebrations 237 years later.

Wishing you good health, much happiness and a grateful heart on this 4th of July Independence Day!

CHEERS!!
Lynn

Growing Up With Daddy-isms

With Father’s Day this Sunday, I can’t help but reflect upon the sweet memories of my dad. OH! MY! GOODNESS! He was such a hoot.  Always cracking a joke or poking fun.  His simple pleasure in life was to make someone laugh and people were just drawn to him.  Everyone wanted to hang out with Allen.

Living in a household full of estrogen, bless his heart, he didn't have a chance.  Even though he denied ever wanting sons, he sometimes had me doing ‘guy’ things with him.  Hunting, fishing, hammering, sawing, painting, wallpapering, electrical and plumbing chores and even car repairs.  I am so grateful because, except for the hunting, I've used all of those skills in my adult life.  (Killing animals to take home to eat definitely was not my thing.)

Best of all, he could give a lecture, teach a lesson or express a feeling with one sentence.  Even though I didn't appreciate his ‘daddy-isms’ at the time, I now see them as wonderful words of truth, advice, feelings and even some uncanny predictions.

So, in memory of the first man I ever loved…here’s to you, Daddy!

“The only thing you get when you cry is a wet face.” 

“Act like something!”

“In a hundred years you won’t even remember this.” 

“You won’t be going on a date with any boy that doesn’t walk to the door to get you.”

“You are not allowed to _____fill in the blank_____________ until you are FORTY.”     (say cuss words, go on a date, ride a motorcycle, leave home, get married, and many other things)

“Someday, New Orleans will be under water.” 

“If I wasn't married to your mother, I’d marry YOU!”

“To catch the big fish, you have to spit on the worm.” 

“Someday, you will talk on a telephone walking around in the grocery store.”

“I can fix anything but a broken heart.”

“You don’t want me to have to show you who’s boss.”

“One day you will laugh about this.”

Wishing all you wonderful Daddy's out there a great Father's Day!

Cheers!

Lynn